just smile

MAHHHH talk talk talk talkkk soo yeaa killing me thinking about college next year but i need to talk to him about college and whats going to happen with us because i dont wanna talk about it but i know that we need to and the best time would be before the summer starts so we know whats going on because the summer is going to be me and you all summer going to the beach hanging out having an amazing time and if we talk about it after its going to be so much harder for you and me. i want to stay together so badly because of how i feel about you and how we just are completly honest with each other and can talk anything and everything out and it works. we work. i cant imagine going to college and saying im single because i really dont want to. my bad feeling is that you wanna go to college and party and drink and just not have to worry about me anymore. i wanna go to college and have fun and go to parties but im not going to be trying to get with every guy there. i wanna try us out during college i dont wanna break up because we are going to college. i wanna give it a chance and have an actual reason. i wanna have a gurnatee that we are NOT going to work and that it was too hard. i dont want it to be oh well we should break up before college because we are far away like no. i wanna text u everyday i wanna come home from break and spend all my time with you and be with you. i am so naive for thinking this. people make it work. my friend and her boyfriend are great and there across the country from each other. i just want him to want to try if not stay together with me. i want him to wanna stay with me but i get a really bad feeling he doesnt want to and that is what hurts the most sadly. im so happy with him and everyone can see that and if we dont go to colleg together i know i am going to miss him and come back from break and just wanna be with him. if he doesnt want to stay together in college then even being bf and gf wen we get home on all r breaks would be good for me also. mahhh this is killing meee we need to talkk

so pretty much my computer is too slow to be using this and now its fast again but i dont have too much to write about right now haha. i am enjoying my senior year and making the most of it and staying out of drama and fights and really just hanging out having fun. my boyfriend is kinda awesome although waiting for him to ask my to prom already haha hopefully that happens soon. im anxious tos ee what he does lol. 

inspiring quote from nicole esterow: hes trying to fit you into his schedule, not make time for you and a boy should always make time for you.

then my friend lex said that to me at lunch the other day. common theme in school right now with that and my friends and boys haha. oh man hey tumblr lol